So many thoughts are swirling through my head and heart these days. So many moments have been experienced over the last 14 months that have shook me, moved me, broken me, taught me, healed me and showed me a view I never knew I needed.

Here are the losses we have had since January 2022:

Deryk’s stepmom Penny -Jan 21,2022

Deryk’s dad Rick- March 15,2022

Deryk’s Auntie Kaye – March 25,2022

Deryk’s Uncle Dave – July 2 2022

Deryk’s cousin Nola – July 14,2022

Deryk’s Auntie Donna – October 3,2022

My Auntie Debbie – October 16, 2022

Deryk’s best friend James – February 8,2023

Deryk’s cousin Carole – February 26, 2023

My Aunt Phyllis – March 3,2023

My best friend Kathleen – March 6,2023

How does one recover from that? What is the lesson?

I had a beautiful, thought provoking conversation with someone yesterday that helped move me from my stuck place. We talked about so many things but one thing stood out more than anything. She said ‘My life is my work versus my work is what I do for a living.’ Her whole life striving for more through her career and forgetting to create a life for herself. Dedicating to serve others but not herself. She wishes she would have chose different.

There is no gold watch at the end and if there is, it’s just a damn watch!

Why is this so easy to hear, to say, to remember but so hard to practice? I think it’s because of the role of serving others. It feels different, I can justify my why because of the impact on not doing it, is felt by others, not just myself.

As I was getting ready to leave, she said something to me that left me breathless. An acknowledgement that meant the world to me. Something that I strive for and feel proud of.

“You always leave people better than when you found them.”

What a beautiful thing to hear. This, this is how I want to be remembered.

Now to find the balance of both. You can’t drink from an empty cup. 💛